Sex Change!
by PureSirius
Summary: Tyson wants a sex change...so he goes to all the Bladebreakers asking advice...how do they react? well...read and you'll find out! RR!
1. Hilary

Padfootlet: this…slightly amusing yet disturbing thought popped into my head while talking to my friend Liz-chan…so…here I am writing it….much to her encouragement…

Disclaimer: Well…if I did own it I know that I wouldn't have made the girl characters so damn annoying…and it would also be one big Yaoi fest.

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"Ugh! I can't find anything to wear!" Hilary's voice sounded through the hotel room, as she threw _more _clothes out of her suitcase in frustration. Once the suitcase was completely empty, she stood up and looked around her room critically, with her hands resting on her hips. "Great now I have this mess to clean up and I _still _don't know what to wear for tonight's dinner with everyone!"

Tyson chose that moment to rudely burst into her room, taking no mind that he was standing on an expensive skirt Hilary had just bought a few days ago. "Hilary…"

"What is it Tyson?" She asked, sounding annoyed, as she threw her clothes back in her suitcase.

"Do you think I should get a sex change?"

Hilary froze as she bent over to pick up one of her (many) pink shirts, before she fell over on her back and started to laugh hysterically.

Tyson puffed out his cheeks. "I'm serious!" He exclaimed, brandishing the magazine that he held in his hand, in the air. "This magazine says that sex changes are pretty common and if you love someone of the same sex that is straight, if you get a sex change they won't have to worry about you being the same sex," he said, reading part of the paragraph to the still hysterical girl.

Finally, Hilary was able to control herself and sat up, still laughing somewhat. "Who (gasp) are you in love (laugh) with?"

Tyson grinned and twirled like a schoolgirl, a trace of pink appearing on his face. "The most incredible, sexiest, hottest, coolest, sex goddiest-"

"Sex goddiest?" Hilary interrupted him, raising an eyebrow. "Is that even a word?"

Tyson ignored her and continued his ramblings. "—Strong, silent, handsome, with those beautiful eyes, his—"

"Who are you talking about Tyson?" Hilary interrupted him, sounding thoroughly annoyed.

Tyson squealed like a schoolgirl again as hearts appeared in his eyes. "Who else! KAI!"

Hilary blinked again, before doubling over with laughter once more. "And…you think (gasp) that becoming a freak show is going to make him fall for you?"

Tyson huffed. "I will be a full-fledged lady if I get that procedure thank you very much poopie pants," he retorted childishly.

Hilary laughed again. "I don't think Kai would want to date you even _if _you were a chick by _birth _Tyson."

"And why's that!" The boy asked, angrily.

"Because you aren't exactly skinny, you're annoying, needy --"

"I am not fat!"

Hilary shrugged and stood up, still chuckling to herself, all the while muttering: "Last week he wanted to be a drag queen now a sex change? I wonder what it'll be next week."

Tyson heard her and replied: "Actually I was thinking about breast implants."

Hilary sweatdropped, and jabbed her index finger to the door. "Out, Tyson."

Sticking his tongue out, he left the room. "Fine…I bet Max will be supportive."

Hilary rolled her eyes and began to clean her room. Who knew Tyson was such a freak?

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Padfootlet: well…there's the first chapter! Next to come…MAXIE! And don't forget to review!


	2. Max

Padfootlet: Here's chapter two! Now it's Maxie-chan's turn!

Disclaimer: see chapter 1

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"MAAAAAXXXX!" Tyson burst into the American's room, where he was lying on his bed watching cartoons and eating a bag of marshmallows.

The blond teen looked away from the television and smiled happily at his friend. "Hi Tyson! What's up?"

"I think that I am going to get a sex change so I can impress Kai and have him fall madly in love with me," Tyson replied, looking down to skim more of the article of the magazine he was holding. "I mean…since he's straight…and…nearly sent me the hospital when I tried to kiss him that one time…I thought that if I became a girl he wouldn't mind…"

Max blinked, before smiling. "Sounds nice Ty. Just don't get your family jewels stuck to the ice again," he said, before turning back to the TV and proceeded stuffing more marshmallows in his mouth.

Tyson shuddered at the thought. "But don't you think that would be a great idea? I mean…I always thought I would look better as a girl anyway…and this offer guarantee's that you'll be a D cup, and have a totally feminine figure…"

Max just continued to hum happily as he finished off his last marshmallow, and bugs escaped Elmer for the hundredth time.

Tyson blinked. "Uh…Maxie?"

"Yeah Ty?"

"Did you understand anything of what I just said?"

"Nope!" The boy chirped happily before bounding off the bed. "Now, if you'll excuse me, I have plans to be strapped to a bed and raped by Esmerelda, then watch her and Starla make out for a while. Hopefully, Esmerelda's ex boyfriend won't show up, he still sore about finding out that she's lesbian and he'll probably want to rape me again." He paused before continuing. "Actually last time wasn't so bad…I mean…getting covered in edible body paint and strawberries isn't too bad…the rape part kind of hurt…but his member is pretty big so it was like trying to squeeze a watermelon through a straw…but now that I think about it, it felt pretty nice…"

Tyson blinked as Max pulled out some edible, strawberry flavored body pain, and a pair of pink fuzzy handcuffs, and calmly walked out of the room humming "I'm too Sexy."

"…I guess I'll go ask Rei."

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Padfootlet: Short…I know…but who ever said that they were gonna be long chapters? Huh huh? Who? NO ONE THAT'S WHO SO DON'T COMPLAIN! Anyway (back to happy self) Review plz!

Oh and I must give credit where credit is due…my friend Liz-chan helped me with this…


	3. Rei

Padfootlet: Here's Rei! Poor Rei…

Disclaimer: once again…see chapter 1

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Tyson found Rei walking out of the hotel gymnasium, a towel slung around his neck, as his tiredly made his way back to his room that he shared with Kai.

Without warning, Tyson sprinted to Rei and bowled over him, causing Rei to fall back and land on his back, with Tyson sitting his stomach, shoving the disturbing magazine article in his face.

"Tyson…" Rei gasped, the pitch of his voice about 5 octaves higher due to the lack of air to his lungs.

"I know! Don't you think me getting a sex change is a good idea too?" Tyson said excitedly, bouncing on Rei's stomach excitedly, not noticing the pain he was causing the poor neko-jin.

" Tyson—oof! Can you—gasp—get off!" Tyson did one last bounce before looking down at his friend worriedly, noticing the usual honey colored eyes were swirls.

"Oh…sorry dude," he apologized, getting up and offering Rei a hand. Rei politely declined, and stood up on his own, brushing the dust off his clothes and making sure none of his ribs were broken

_'Tyson really needs to lay off those ho hos,' _he thought to himself. "Anyway…what were you saying about a sex change?" He asked, giving his friend a strange look.

Tyson gave a big grin, and held out the article with both hands so Rei could take it, which he did. The moment the neko-jin took it he regretted his decision. Scanning the article, his eyes widened, as it described the procedure in great, detail to the point to where it was disturbing.

"Uh…Tyson…" Rei said, unable to finish the article. "You're not thinking about actually _doing _this are you?"

"Well I figured it would be the best way to get Kai to fall for me!" Tyson said excitedly. "Besides _you _of all people should understand right? I mean…I know you try and hide it but there is no way you can be a guy Rei…"

Rei nearly choked at this. Tyson thought he a was a chick? Sure, he did have a lithe figure, but that was the neko-jin in him, he had long hair, because he refused to cut it. But he was still a dude!

"I mean…the long hair…" Tyson listed off, ticking off each thing on his fingers. "The soft features of your face…your lithe figure…the grace in which you walk…"

"Maybe…" Rei rolled his eyes. "Because I am a neko-jin, Tyson."

Tyson ignored him, and stopped listing off the things that presumably made Rei a chick. "So…" the teen said, looking at his friend, the grin never leaving his face. "Tell me…where did you go? Actually don't answer that…they didn't really do a good job did they? I mean…I suppose you must have a vagina…but you have no breasts and you still sound like a guy…though they did do well with the plastic surgery part…and your hair has that sleek shiny thing going on too so I suppose that's good…but I wonder do you have to go through that whole 'time of the month' thing? I suppose you do," Tyson said thoughtfully. "I mean…you do get a bit moody…" Tyson continued to ramble on, clearly not noticing that Rei had walked off, shaking his head at his friend's stupidity.

_'First the drag queen transvestite idea now this? Next week he'll want to try the whole dominatrix thing,'_ Rei thought to himself.

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Padfootlet:…ook..so..still not all that long but at least it was funny ne?


	4. Kenny

Padfootlet: Alas! It is Kenny's turn!

Disclaimer: You see that chapter labeled Hilary? Go there to read the pointless thing…

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When Tyson realized Rei had left him, he went back upstairs and entered Kenny's room, where he found the young genius typing away on Dizzy as usual. "Hey chief. You working on updating our blades?"

Kenny's eyes never looked away from the screen as his shook his head, his light brown mop on top of his head moving with the movement of his head. "I am looking up the proper procedure for surgical reproductive system alteration."

Tyson blinked. "Say what?"

Kenny sighed, "To put it in terms you can understand, Tyson, a sex-change. I have discovered that the testosterone-induced mania of manhood is simply unfitting for someone of my intellectual capability and have decided to embark upon a journey that could lead me to better things in life."

Tyson's face lit up and he patted chief on the back rather roughly. "Someone that understands!"

Kenny swirled around in his chair. "You mean you are looking at a sex change as well?"

Tyson nodded happily. "It's to make Kai fall in love with me!"

Kenny rolled his eyes (not like Tyson could see) and swirled around in his seat again, and started typing on Dizzy again.

"You know how sick and wrong this is don't you Chief?" Dizzy piped up. "I mean you don't see me going around saying I want to grow a—"

"You're a computer Dizzy and unable to acquire the male organs so in this case your opinion is inadequate."

"Well excuse me Mr. I-want-to-be-a-freak-of-nature-because-I-am-unable-to-masturbate, but changing your sex is just simply against the laws of nature…and FYI chief…I am a bit-beast it was _you _who trapped me in the piece of scrap metal."

"Quiet Dizzy."

Though Tyson though it was great that his friend was going to get a sex change as well, he didn't want to get in the middle of the two fighting so he quickly ran out of the room to find the next poor soul he was going to tell his idea: Kai.

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Padfootlet: Again…short…but…again…I never said the chapters were going to be long…lol plz review! And thank you again Liz-chan for helping me with making Kenny sound…Kenny-ish lol!


	5. Kai

OOPadfootlet: ANNNNDDD HERE'S KAI!

Disclaimer: chapter one…once again

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Kai lay on his bed with his cd player blaring, and his eyes closed, enjoying the solitude and the fact he was alone with his music. Of course, since the music was so loud and his eyes were closed, he did not noticed Tyson creep into his room. That is until…

"KKAAAAIII!" Tyson yelled at the top of his lungs, jumping on Kai as he did Rei about an hour ago.

The sudden, and unwelcome weight on his stomach jolted Kai back to the very real, and very ugly reality of the world. When he saw Tyson's face grinning happily down at him, Kai angrily shoved him off roughly, resulting in the boy landing on the ground with an ungraceful _'thud'_. Ripping off his headphones, Kai glared down at the boy who had hastily gotten up from the ground, grinning like the idiot he was.

"What the hell do you want Tyson? Go annoy someone else with your stupidity," he growled, getting up from the bed, only to be tackled to the ground by Tyson.

"Do you think I would look sexy as a girl Kai?" Tyson asked, after Kai shoved him off again, and got up, freezing I the middle of brushing his shirt off, before doing exactly what Hilary had done: fell back laughing.

As sexy and hot Tyson thought Kai was, seeing him laugh like that was just creepy. "Tyson…all the dieting in the world, plus plastic surgery wouldn't make you any more attractive than an ape!" Kai said, finally controlling his laughter, and sitting up, regaining his normal composer.

"But Kaaaiii! You think Rei is attractive!" Tyson whined, clinging to Kai's arm as the bluenette stood up to leave the room.

Again, Kai froze. "Who said--?"

"It's obvious! It's because he's a girl right?" Tyson continued to whine, hanging on to Kai, ignoring the disgusted look on his captain's face. "If I get a sex change we can live happily ever after and you won't have to worry about being gay!"

Kai's eyes widened, as he tried to pry Tyson from his arm, but all the strength in the world would not get the leach off his arm. "Get off Tyson! Unless you want—"

"Why don't you love me Kai?" Tyson whined. "It's because I am a guy right?"

"That and you're an annoying little maggot who doesn't deserve to exist," Kai growled, wishing more than ever Tyson would let go of his arm; it was losing feeling and Kai could have sworn he saw a faint tinge of blue.

"But I would make a pretty girl wouldn't I?" Tyson persisted, landing back on the floor when Kai finally dislodged himself from the dragon.

"You would make a good slab of meat for the rabid dogs at the pound," Kai muttered under his breath, heading towards the door. "Leave me alone Tyson."

Apparently, the deranged teen either was completely stupid, or he was ignoring his captain, as he jumped on Kai's back. Yep. Defiantly the former, Kai thought.

"KAAAIII! TELL ME! I WOULD LOOK HOT AND SEXY IN A D CUP! I COULD GIVE YOU LAP DANCES AND BARE YOUR WONDERFUL EQUALLY SEXY HOT CHILDREN!"

"You are one sick—"

From the room next door, Kai heard Kenny yelling: "JUST BECAUSE I CAN'T MASTUBATE DOESN'T MAKE ME A FREAK! JUST WANT A SEX CHANGE OK DIZZY?"

Then Dizzy's response: "IT'S SICK AND WRONG CHIEF! ALMOST AS WRONG AS BECOMING A DOMINATRIX!"

From the room across the hall, Max's room, he heard a series of loud, disturbing orgasms from what sounded like a transvestite, a lesbian, a gay man, and Max.

Seconds later, Rei came running into the room, slamming the door shut, as if he had been running from something. "Max is trying to get me whipped by that transvestite in his room!" He looked positively horrified as he stared at Kai, who was currently banging his head against the wall repeatedly.

"Kai! Tell me if I should get a sex change!"

"TYSON GO TO HELL! YOU'RE GIVING ME A HEADACHE!" Kai yelled, ceasing his banging to glare at the teen.

"Tyson…" Rei spoke up. "I think Max said something about that lesbian out there getting a sex change a few weeks ago…go talk to—" A blue and red blur shot passed him and slammed the door open, then shut.

"How can I ever thank you?" Kai muttered, flopping on his bed.

"Get a cat scan for Tyson, Max, and Kenny," Rei replied, flopping down on his bed.

Kai grinned. "You know…he's asked all of us about that stupid sex change hasn't he?"

Rei looked over to Kai's bed and raised an eyebrow. "Yeah?"

"Guess who _else _he knows that is staying at this hotel…and is _bound _to ask."

Rei thought for a moment before giving a feral grin. "Tala, Bryan, Spencer, and Ian."

Kai nodded, and put his headphones back on, while he and Rei thought simultaneously, _'Poor bastards.'_

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Padfootlet: originally…this was only going to be a 5-chapter thing…but seeing as it was so popular with all of you guys…I decided to inflict Tyson upon the Blitzkrieg Boys that is of course if I get enough reviews TELLING me I should…(hint hint)


	6. Tala

tuaPadfootlet: Well…I guess I will do the Blitzkrieg Boys…I don't know if you should have pity on them or Tyson…lol…I know it's been a while…

Disclaimer: once again…SEE CHAPTER ONE IF YOUR THAT INTERESTED!

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Tala sighed, as he closed the door to his hotel room. The fact that Tate's room was right above him was very annoying. Honestly, doesn't he _ever _get tired of his little playmates? Every day, and every night it was the same thing. Tala never got a good night's sleep either because he was busy keeping Bryan from going upstairs and killing the blond, or he was busy thinking of ways _he _could murder him.

A loud banging came from his hotel room door, before it was burst open and a streak of blue and red ran past him. Tala barely managed to dodge Tyson as he streaked by and ran head first into the glass doors that lead to the balcony.

"Ever heard of _waiting _before you enter someone's room, Tyson?" He practically growled, fixing the younger teen with a death glare.

Ignoring the redhead, Tyson picked himself off the floor. "Tala, you and Kai are best friend, _rrrriiiiggghhhttt?"_

Tala didn't like the look on Tyson's face. "Why?" He asked slowly.

"I want to know how to woo him!"

Tala's eyebrows knitted together. "What?"

"WOO him!"

Tala looked even more confused. "What!"

Tyson sighed. "I want to get a sex change! I want to know what Kai goes for!"

Tala stood in the middle of his hotel room, before turning and walking into the small kitchen. "Get out of my room, Tyson."

"BUT TALA!"

"I don't know what woo is. And I sure as hell don't want to know why you want to get a sex change. Out."

Tyson puffed out his cheeks. "Fine." He stalked over to where Wolborg sat on the table next to the couch. "If you don't help me then Wolborg gets it!" He grabbed the blade and went outside.

"You sound like you have a hostage at gun point," Tala commented, not even turning around.

Tyson held Wolborg over the railing They were more than 10 stories up, there was no way even Tala's blade would survive a fall like that. "Tell me!"

Tala sighed and turned around, his eyes widening when he saw what exactly Tyson was doing. His blue eyes narrowed dangerously. "You do and you're dead."

"My hand is slipping!"

Tala rushed over and before Tyson could blink, grabbed Wolborg and grabbed Tyson b y the collar, hanging him over the railing.

"AAHH! ARE YOU CRAZY THAT'S A 10 STORY DROP!"

Tala gave a feral grin. "I know."

"I DON'T WANNA DIIIIIIIIEEEE!"

"I'm not going to kill you until I find out what woo is."

"I WANT KAI TO FALL IN LOVE WITH ME!"

Tala was silent for a few seconds before collapsing in laughter. Of course, he was too busy laughing to remember that he was holding Tyson over a railing, and now the blader was clinging on for dear life (literally) to the railing of the balcony.

"TALA! IT'S NOT FUNNY! KENNY WANTS ONE TOO! AND REI ALREADY GOT ONE! I WANT ONE TOO! I BET YOU GOT ONE TOO!"

Tala wasn't listening he just continued to laugh. "Tyson…all the plastic surgery in the world wouldn't get Kai interested in you!"

"Why does every keep saying that?"

Tala continued to laugh.

"You know, laughing just doesn't work for you," Tyson muttered. "AND HELP ME BACK UP! I WANT TO HAVE SEX WITH KAI BEFORE I DIE!"

A hand reached down and helped him from the railing so his feet were now firmly on the concrete balcony. Tala was still busy laughing, so who helped him? It could only mean one thing…

"KAI! I KNEW YOU LOVED--!"

What he saw however, was not Kai. It was one of Max's transvestite lovers.

"Hello sweetheart," she said in a manly voice.

Tyson's eyes widened. "Um…sorry for bothering you Tala I'll go ask Spencer." He bolted out of the hotel room and slammed the door shut.

Tala stopped laughing and stood up. Dusting himself off, he looked at the woman. "How much do I owe you, Bella?"

The woman grinned seductively (to her at least it was). "How about a night in bed, pretty boy?"

Tala pulled out his wallet. "How about twenty bucks and the key to Tyson's room?" he said, holding out the money, and the key that Tyson dropped.

The transvestite took the money and key. "Nice doin business with you, Tala."

Tala smirked, and showed Bella out the door, before going in the kitchen to make a hot pot of strong coffee.

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